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Deeps
Jun 24, 2024
In Ask Boltfam
you are constipated, sweaty, out of breath and you are dropping the biggest deuce of your life painfully talking, but in a low tone Hey-uhhh Charger Chat Guys, uh I thought id ask you a couple questions fart Oh man, i better be quick. Okay here are some fastballs for each of you. oh godddddd fart and chunk noises Question number one: Kyle, from a coaching perspective, how big of a challenge will it be for pipkins to move in to right guard? Question number fart two: WoolDawg, what would you say has been biggest character difference that you have noticed from Herbo since the new regime change? Question number three: Kevin fart who can win in a fight between you and kyle? I know you are older but sometimes younger siblings can have an edge, who would win? BONUS LOUD FART QUESTION: If you had to dress up as a giant taco for an entire year, but in return fart you gained the ability to teleport anywhere in the world instantly, would you? OKay, that is all * HUGE BIG PUSH FOLLOWED BY GROANS, LOUD, LIKE THE BIGGEST RELEASE JUST LEFT YOUR BODY* PANTING FTR, suck my but-... runs out of bathroom stall Someone barges in, noticing the humongous pile of poo in the toilet. angry german voice WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS SHIT! WHOOOO DID THIS UPPER DECKERRRRRRRR!!!! finds sticky note on stall FAMILY TRUST RESPECT? SUCK MY BUTT?! CURSE YOU CHARGER FANSSSSS!!
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Deeps
Sep 24, 2023
In Ask Boltfam
Trump Voice We have to hold these boys accountable! Terrible execution! hold one finger up   IF I was head coach... my CBs will NOT be beat by receivers like that.. let me tell you. I would kick them in the keyster so bad, theyd wish they'd locked them up better.   We should lock up crooked staley for not getting these fine gentleman more prepared.   I mean... they gave up (exaggerate this part) HUUUUUUGEEE passes.. its terrible.   Anyway, it is a pleasure to be here boys, have not talked to you in a while.. I just wanted to ask you TWO(hold up 1 finger in each hand) questions.   Do you think the Los Angeles Chargers play TOUGH football? I dont think enough of  our players  have that quotes with fingers DAWG in them. I want our players to be known as players who punch the opposing teams in the mouth... i think there is a real emphasize this into the mic PROBLEM with the culture Staley has built.   Here is my second question... are you ready? Kevin are you paying attention?(wait for response) Oh you are? Whats 15 x 12...(let him try to answer... its 180) i kid i kid.   Here it is... You have come across a device, which lets you talk to everyone in the world, but has a lifespan of 30 seconds what are you telling them?   As always, thank you for the podcast, you boys do an amazing job... let me tell ya. Lets get this train back on track and lets go win a superbowl. MAKE THE CHARGERS GREAT AGAIN... FTR... k luv you bye!
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Deeps
Oct 18, 2022
In Ask Boltfam
(Pothead voice) Why are people saying it was a boring game? The atmosphere at SoFi was ELECTRIC. This was a battle of stellar defenses! A true football experience, as fans we have been conditioned to have 50pts/game. This is not the case anymore, defenses are getting alot better and the stats are there to prove it! * bong rip* Chargers fans forced Denver to switch to a silent count, how crazy is that? Also, is it just me or every time I go to a chargers game at SoFi, I come across one or two raider fans that are desperately craving attention looking for a fight, I was at the game against the Donkeys and he was rooting for them as a raiders fan, THEN he starts rooting for the lakers! Can Raiders fans be more awful? Oh, I had a fun question for you three.... *looks around the room , then finds a crumpled up piece of paper with question in it* *giggles* okay, Would you rather have a tree in your garden that constantly produces every fruit in the world, the best quality and in the best condition, or a trained dinosaur of your choice to like ride to work or whatever. I would personally take the dinosaur because I would ride my T Rex to every football game and wave a chargers flag, but thats just me. Have fun with it and THINK about the implications of both, (i/e how would you feed the dinosaur?) Also, congrats to y'all on the Padres win, we boltfam may clash during baseball season, but if it cant be the Dodgers, as a Chargers fan born in LA, I wouldn't want any other team to win than the Padres. Good Luck Boys! As always, Fuck the Broncos, Fuck the Chiefs and ABSOLUTELY fuck the Raiders. K luv you bye
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Deeps
Aug 18, 2022
In Ask Boltfam
Saw this post on reddit and wanted each of your responses to this scenario! How many kindergartners do you think you could personally take on in a fight before being overpowered? Stipulations and context: The kindergartners are released 5 at a time every 30 seconds. The arena is a standard sized classroom, let's say 40 feet wide by 25 feet deep. However, the room is completely empty. The kindergartners are unarmed. They are just going to run at you, attempting to punch, kick, bite, and scratch you. Their ultimate goal is to cumulatively dog pile on you and pin you to the ground. If they can pin you for 15 consecutive seconds, you lose. You have to knock a kindergartner unconscious in order to defeat them. Once they are knocked unconscious, they vanish from the classroom arena. You can use any strategy you want to fend them off, but you are also unarmed and you are not allowed to leave the room. Thanks for your time! f*ck the raiders kluvyoubye
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Deeps
Jul 29, 2022
In Ask Boltfam
Coach: In an interview with Tom Telesco, Tom was asked about the defensive overhaul that took place this offseason, one word he mentioned was "upgrades". Given that there is a general consensus that "iron sharpens iron", do you think that Trey Pipkins and Storm Norton will benefit from practicing with some of the best Edge defenders in the NFL. The obvious answer is yes, but will it also impede the offense from being productive in practice if Khalil/Bosa are too much for Pip/Storm? Or will everyone involved benefit? Kevin: Chris Hayre and Matt "Money" Smith talked about Tom Telesco's time with the Colts and how failure to build around Andrew Luck resulted in a short lived NFL career....one of the best college prospects in NFL history retired at 29. Telesco has in his tenure with the Chargers drafted a plethora of O-Lineman, but more so in the last two seasons in Slater, Zion, adding Feiler, Oday and making Linsley the highest paid center in the NFL, how big of an eye opener was seeing Herbert's massive success in his first two years in the NFL to Telesco, he has clearly put a giant emphasis on protecting the future of this franchise, do you think he will continue to do so in the upcoming drafts, or do you think our guys right now are enough? Wool Dawg: This is more of a personal question pertaining to your relationship to the guys, how have you managed to keep such a strong friendship with the two of them being hundreds of miles apart whilst you were living in Idaho? Hindsight being the podcast, but is there more to it than that? Is it the love of the Chargers? Or was it something stronger than that that strengthened your brother like relationship with Kevin and Kyle? Now, a FUN question for the three of you: If the chargers had an open spot for a waterboy and you 3 were the only candidates allowed to apply, would you apply for the position? How would you be a better waterboy than the other two? You would take on the salary that comes along with it and have to move to Los Angeles when needed. Thank you for taking the time in answering my questions and thank you for being apart of my mornings every Tuesday and Friday. Oh and a yuuuuuuge f*ck you to the Raiders, kluvyoubye
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